19: Memories

Rohan

     I knew it. I just KNEW it! I knew there was something special about Yadira.

     I didn't take long to get over my horrible fear that something terrible had happened to her since she'd been missing all night. When she showed up this morning looking the way she did, I found that my wife still had the ability to stun me.

      She didn't remember me. Or anyone. And that distressed her. Honestly, I'm not too worried. Her memories should come back. She's still my wife, a woman ten times more amazing than I thought, and I'd already thought she was amazing.

     I know what Zuri was thinking. I know why she would've fit in nicely with the Trags. She's very religious in her own way. It was her influence that made me believe Yadira was a goddess when I first met her. Looking at Zuri's expression, that's what she's thinking.
    Not that I can blame her! All we have to do is LOOK at Yadira to know something happened to her, and the story she's telling sounds an awful lot like stories Zuri herself told me. I'd never shared any of that with Yadira, the stories, and I doubt Zuri has taken the time to tell her either since she's been so focused on Asa, her daughter, and Vik with her daughter.
     Orion's depression barely registers on my radar. Honestly, I don't care. Yadira's my wife. He can't have her, and he needs to get over that fact.

     Yadira goes to lie down; Orion mumbles something about fishing; and Zuri tells us she's going to check on Amina... and Asa. She winks. Poor boy. She's wearing him out.
     That leaves me standing here alone with Vik. Sama went inside to nurse Zane.

     Honestly, ever since our altercation about Sama, I've tried to steer clear of alone time with Vik. The fight may be over, but I'm still on my guard, not knowing if his temper will explode again.
     "We're in deep shit, Rohan. I need to impress upon you that fact."
     "Come again?" My wife shows up glowing like the sun, looking more beautiful than I've ever seen her, and you tell me we're in deep shit?
     Is this still about Sama? When will he get it through his head that it was all her idea?
     "For one, haven't you heard? Reck thinks Amina is his. It's the reason we left. My life was at stake if he'd found out. He would've found some way to do me in."
     "Right. That's why you left. How does that put us in deep shit?"

     "Surely he's not dumb enough to sail this close to winter, but I wouldn't put it past him to send out scouts."
      I want to ask him if he's just being paranoid, but I phrase it differently. "Are you sure he'd go so far as to send out good men looking for who he thinks is his daughter?"
      He looks at me now. "And Zuri." To answer my knowing look, he says, "You know how he always obsessed over her."
     I think back. "Ever since that day with the wolves."

     Reck and I were once friends--of a sort. It was his best mate who died of the poisonous berry, and he sort of went inward after that. Orion would try to draw him out, but all he did was annoy him. Reck would actually listen to ME, and he'd open up. Well, as much as Reck would ever open up.
     Until that day Zuri showed up. While I'd helped Jers down from the tree branch he'd clung to, I watched as my sort-of mate's eyes glazed over and an obsession took hold. Amazingly, Zuri managed him, taking other lovers as well yet making him feel special. As the years went on, though, I started noticing his anger growing, and when Zuri attempted to seduce ME, I stopped her. Anyone on Reck's bad side would end up in some kind of miserable state one way or another. Which is why I left. Which is why Vik and Zuri eventually had to leave with Amina--and Orion in their wake.
     And now we're harboring them.

     "You really think his obsession would take him this far?"
     "Possibly. As far as he knows, we could be anywhere. But the currents..."
     Right. With the global climate changes, the ocean currents changed, making what would've been a much longer journey here quite swift by comparison, thanks to the different currents. This little area is sitting smack-dab in the middle of a likely search area. "Fuck."
     "Exactly. Mind you, I had no intention of dragging you all into this mess, but..." He turns around and looks longingly back at Sama's house, and I immediately understand. He turns his head back, clears his throat, sees my expression, and continues, "I've been working on different ways to hopefully be able to defend ourselves, but I don't know if we have enough TIME to build the fortifications we might require."
     "Well, how many would he send? Three? Four? He can't exactly spare them."
     "Right. But my latest fear NOW is that someone gets back to him. Look at this place, Rohan."
     "I know, I know. It still needs work, but--"
     "Look at it, everything, with HIS eyes."
      I stop and try to do as he asks. It's a small island, hardly worth the trouble. Surely, the town would have more to offer. I already HAD thought of those things, and that's why I chose to come here. But now, if word got back to him that Zuri is here, that Amina is here, that the 'traitors' Rohan and Orion are here, that the man Vik who he thinks stole 'his' woman is here, it's too tempting a target.
     And once here, he'd see the beauty and untapped richness of the place, something that had been steadily decreasing in his area. My eyes look over our beloved, albeit still messy, settlement, and I land on my small house. And I don't want to think of what he'd do to everything, and especially everyONE here.
     "Do you see what I'm saying now?"

      Vik sighs. "He wanted to conquer the Trags because he saw them as weak, at least as much as he explained to the council. How much weaker are we when compared to them? By his reckoning, not much."
     "But this is OUR island." Fuck, Vik is smart. I think I finally understand where he's leading the conversation. "You're saying we need to plant traps and hidden defenses as well as the obvious ones. The 'home-field advantage.'" We could build underground hiding places as well.
     "Yes, that is obvious. But although he's not particularly a religious man, if he saw what we saw this morning..." He leaves his statement hanging in the air.
     "He'd try to use that too. Use her." Holy fucking shit. Yadira's mysterious transformation may have placed her in more danger than she was already in simply from being beautiful. Reck has always wanted power and whatever tools he can use to gain it.

     Vik and I spend the rest of the daylight hours planning our next steps in future defense of the island and those we love. As the sun sets, we return to those loved ones.

     My wife sleeps peacefully, having no idea the dangers out there that want to destroy everything we have. I decide I won't trouble her with them. She has enough on her plate at the moment.
     "Yadira." I'm not surprised she's still asleep. She was gone all night to wherever it was she went. She was exhausted.

     Her eyes open, and she smiles at me, looking like nothing has changed, like she knows who I am. I smile brightly back at her. Then, my spirits sink as I watch the look of confusion take over.
     But did she ACTUALLY remember for a moment?
     I take a resigned breath and have a seat next to her.

      "Did you sleep well?"
      "Yes. I was having a nice dream."
      I smile. "What was it about?"
      She blushes. "You."
      YES! "So you... remember me?"
      She looks worried, shaking her head no. "I'm sorry. I'm trying. I really am, Rohan, but I can't remember anything!"
      Wait a minute...

     "Who told you my name?" In all the confusion from earlier, she never heard my name. I know because that bugged me every once in a while all day when I was working with Vik.
      She looks surprised. "I... don't know. I thought I already knew it. It was in the dream."
      I take her hand. "What else was in the dream?" I'm desperate to tell her who I am, what we are, but I want to know what she knows without trying.
      She looks down at her hand in mine and smiles shyly.
      "What did we do in the dream?" Yes, something happened to her. I don't know what, but that's still my Yadira in there.

     "We were... together, and... naked." She blushes again.
     I grin. "I'm liking this dream already." I bring her hand to my lips and kiss it. She giggles. I ask, "What were we doing naked?"
     "Probably exactly what you're thinking. It was daytime, and we were under a propped-up animal skin. I could hear the waves."
      Our first time. The fountain gave her back our first time. I say a quick prayer of thanks. Quick because I have a more pressing need to kiss her.

      She makes a sound of surprise, but she also doesn't try to pull away. This tells me a lot. She knows from a dream that we're something special, but it must feel strange to her to have her 'dream lover' suddenly kiss her for what, to her, feels like the first time.
      "I love you, Yadira." I gently and slowly kiss her face over and over again.
      "I... I know." She takes a breath. "All I have are emotions, like phantom memories, and I know I love you too."
       I kiss her harder, making my intent very clear that I want her, but, to her, it still feels like our first time, even with the dream. It was just a dream, after all, even though it probably was accurate. Still, she's not ready, so I, feeling like I'm back in time to a little over a year ago, don't push her past making out. While I do, I do my best to remind her of everything we've shared: our meeting each other, becoming closer, when I finally kissed her, when we made love the first time (I was right about the dream's accuracy!), and the fact that we're married by saying vows to each other before the gods as our witnesses.
      Zuri mentioned Yadira's memories might come back, and I pray they do. Until then, I'll enjoy winning her heart all over again.
      I have some rather nice dreams myself tonight.